Look For Me
by 0-Oliver-0
Summary: But he didn't want to love, nor did he want to run. He didn't want to lose. Lose everything! Lose everything! Lose everything he ran so far for. When that happens, 'they'll' find him. And he'll stop running. When he stops running, he'll never find her. (AU, centers around Rin and Len)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hello there, my first fan fiction_ posted_, _constructive_ criticism is welcome! ^,^ **

* * *

_"L-Len" Rin heaved," Len. Go on, please, I'm not going to make it!" _

_He whipped around, grabbing her shoulders, all while partially shaking her. _

_"RIN! Don't talk like that. W-we're going to make it Rin…! We are! Both of us! We're gonna make it…" Throughout the sentence, his voice faded, displaying the worry and stress he felt. _

_"I l-love you, Len…! W-when we're safe, c-can we drink orange j-juice again?"_

_"Yeah, we'll have b-bananas t-too."_

_A voice shattered the serene moment, destroying every trace of sentiment there._

_"HEY! LOOK! THEY'RE OVER THERE!_

_Len bolted as fast and far as his small legs could take him. He felt his sister stumbling behind him, through the jerks of his hand. However, he never felt her let go._

_It had been two days. He had not eaten nor slept, and had run through the woods trying to retrace his steps. He was caked with dried mud, and his hair was matted. His throat hurt. His feet hurt. His eyes burned. He was aching everywhere. The boy could only think of one person, though, Rin. He collapsed._

_"Rin, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry… "He whispered, voice high and cracking. Len's eyes clamped shut, a single tear ran down his face. He had cried the rest out. Oh, how hungry he was. But the thirst was far worse, he was constantly coughing, and it stung so much. And then he heard voices._

_"Rin, is t-that you?" He rasped. Please, god, please._

_"No, not Rin, honey…" A hard, painful, lump formed in his throat and then, realizing the circumstances Len quickly struggled to his feet, in panic-mode, "D-Don't take me back!"_

_"That poor thing." He heard someone say in a low voice. More comments followed. He was terrified. Who were these people? Were they f-from the house?_

_Len wouldn't let them take him. He would not return. And so he ran._

_However, he was weakened. His feet, his aching feet gave out._

_"Honey, we aren't going to hurt you!" Len wouldn't believe her crap. She was after him. Her and her friends were going to punish him for running._

_"STAY AWAY!" Len had to find her. He couldn't get caught. He couldn't get caught. He couldn't get caught. Never. Never. Never. Nevernevernevernevernever. His finger nails had the lady's blood and skin on it, or, the fingernails he had left. The woman was clutching her arm. He tried to scramble away, but he wasn't on his feet. They grabbed him._

_"RIN!" He half sobbed, half shrieked. It was the last thing he said._

* * *

_~Look For Me~_

"Ren! Come downstairs… NOW!" The sound of his "mother" resounded up the stairs and into his room. It had been years; it had been six lonely years, since the 'incident'.

Len may have been exhausted that day, when _they _asked him for his name, but he wasn't too out of it then. Of course, what he had done was given them a false name. But the fatigue had taken its toll, and he'd given a name loosely based off of his own… and _h-hers:_ Ren Kagami.

He changed his appearance as well. _They wouldn't find him. They wouldn't. They wouldn't. They wouldn't._

He was more… manly, one would say. Instead of the cute, little, 'energetic' blond boy with shocking-blue eyes that clearly harbored a painful secret, he was now a lanky, quiet, handsome face, that spoke of guilt and uncertainty. His hair had grown out to his shoulders, which he usually attired in a small pert ponytail. He'd changed how he dressed, how he acted, and never spoke. He wouldn't... he wanted to sing and speak, but with _her._

Len gave up his life for her. He searched day and night for any clue, just ONE clue that… that _she_ was still out there, alive.

"REN!" He grimaced. That wasn't his name. Ren was not Len. Ren wasn't _real._

_"Coming,"_ he wanted to say. _He wanted to. He wanted to. He wanted to._

Instead, he dragged his pathetically depressed frame downstairs. He was clad in a simple yellow t-shirt, alongside his best jeans. _The shirt was yellow, not orange. He hated orange. He hated orange because he loved it so much._

He eyed the breakfast his 'mother' had so kindly set out for him: orange juice, and a banana. Great.

She knew; he hated her. How convenient! _But nobody knew,_ he reminded himself.

_Rin did. Rin did. Rin did. _

_Rin knew. She knew. She knew._

_Ren didn't, Len did. Ren didn't, Len did. Ren didn't, Len did. _

_I'm Ren, right? _He absolutely hated it.

And almost instantly, his appetite was gone. Just like the lone fact that _she_ was gone. _It_ is gone, and _she_ gone. He really couldn't bring anything back.

Never. Nothing. God, how useless was he? Useless. Useless. Useless.

"Ren," Sakine Meiko, his 'mother' sighed, removing the hand she'd been waving on front of his face away," You tuned out. Again."

He stared.

"Ren," She placed a hand on his cheek affectionately, gazing with sympathetic chocolate orbs into his, " You have to open up _some _day…"

Len stared; _he stared, and he stared._

She embraced. _She wasn't Rin. He only wanted Rin._

She released him from her hold, and as he left, placed a hand on his shoulder, "Go to school, Ren." she smiled somberly, "Remember, you're not mine, but I love you like my own. _So much_, Ren. So much."

He hated Meiko; he hated her so much, because he loved her. But he didn't want to love, nor did he want to run. He didn't want to _lose._

_Lose everything! Lose everything! Lose everything he ran so far for._

When that happens, 'they'll' find him. And he'll stop running. When he stops running, he'll never find her.

* * *

**A/N: Len is OCD. Otherwise known as Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. OCD is where you have to repeat things or actions over and over again. He also 'has' selective mutenism. **

**Don't kill me! **

**Other chapters WILL be longer. Well, I hope. Tell me if you want me to continue and if you have any questions, PM me! ^-^ I hope you enjoyed...**

**Oh, by the way, if you hate Oliver, Len, and/or Rin for some reason, you probably shouldn't be reading this. WRONG FIC XD! **

**Meiko is out of character... She'll be more in character when she's had a little to drink! Hahaha.**

**So... yeah... Thanks for reading, non-reviewers... And reviewers, THANK YOU SO MUCH! ;D... Yup. I'll try to update every week depending on how much 'inspiration' I get. _HINT HINT!_**

**Lastly, IF you're actually reading this, and there's a Vocaloid you want me to include, feel free to PM me. **

**Oh, and OLIVER IS CUUUUTE! w Thank you for reading, my fellow writers/readers and once more, CONSTRUCTIVE critisism is totally epic!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Oh. I didn't realize that school would sneak up and bit my arse... XD Sorry... Erm, here's my next chapter and THANK YOU!**

* * *

_He didn't speak, he wrote, he thought. He didn't want to speak, his voice sounded like hers, but it wasn't her. _

_He didn't cry, when they had brought him to the house of lonely kids. Lonely kids like him. The orphanage. But they hadn't lost her. He wasn't abused, mocked, and mentally broken down here. And yet for once in his life... _

_Len Kagamine was truly alone. Everything he had loved was taken away from him. He ran for her, not him; her. He would keep running, though, for that very reason. For that small hope that they would be forever together and happy one-day. Such a small hope, a false hope. A false hope that drove people away. He wanted friends. He wanted his sister. He wanted his name. He wanted to live._

_To live, not survive. Len was so lonely. He couldn't tell them anything. He knew nothing. He knew nothing because he was not Len. He could not be Len. He could not be Len without Rin. _

_He wanted._

_And so he clung on to that hope. That small hope. That small hope that was keeping him alive. 'How pitiful,' he would think. _

_A tough concept that those at the age of eight could hardly grasp. However, Len could not grasp many things. He ate, but what about Rin. He slept in a comfortable bed, but what about Rin. What was happening to Rin?_

_Suffering._

_'R-Rin... If you come b-back, we can eat oranges... Without bananas, t-too! Just, please... P-please?' It was almost as if he thought she could hear him. He would gladly go back, he would. But the deal. Those wise words that were not meant to tumble out of her mouth. Those words, their plan. That's what was keeping him from his sister._

_His sister whom would still be here with him. Whom would be here with him if it wasn't for those kids._

_Those loud kids._

_Those stupid kids who heard, heard their plan. _

_And had those kids not heard their plan, their plan to escape the 'house', Rin would be with him._

_Rin, who was suffering because of them. _

_Those retarded kids whom he hated, hated so much._

_Hated so much he took it out on others on his arrival to the orphanage they brought him to. And so, nobody liked him. Len was lonley and Rin was his ghost. His ghost that told him what reminded him of Rin. A ghost that haunted him._

_Rin was a ghost of the past that he couldn't hide from. That the name, the cover, Ren wouldn't get rid of. Because Len didn't like this ghost, but he loved it. loved it so much it hurt._

_And it was those kids who caused it. _

_With the 'house,' the escape, and the plan. _

_They heard the plan. Rin got caught, and they were both suffering._

* * *

Len walked down the cement paved path to school. He was a freshman in highschool. He wasn't very popular, but he had some acquaintances to... talk... to. It was sad, really, in his opinion. People did tend to stay away from him...

Others tried to torment him for no reason. At all. But he reasoned that they were desperate to be 'cool'. He never responded. Afterall, it happened to everyone and he didn't give a flying-

"RENNY-KUUUUUNNNN!" He was 'glomped'. And, by the high-pitched voice, the distinctive teal hair and eyes and the... pig-tails, it took no genius to figure out it was Miku. He sighed, aloud. W-wait, was she... pouting?

He sweat-dropped. Maybe he shouldn't act so exasperated on front of his friends.

"**Miku, why do you tackle me daily?**" Len supposed he _did _have some good friends. He instantly regretted his words because a dark expression was cast upon the girls face.

"Because...," Len was very creeped out. Miku was now rubbing her hands together with and evil grin on her face, "You don't scream."

He visibly paled.

"**Umm... I've got to go!**" He wrote frantically on his beloved white-board. Miku started cackling and Len fled. Because Miku was older and not in any of his electives, they only got to talk during passing time and their small nutrition break, but it was always fun... Not that he'd admit it. Miku and Len were best of friends. The only person Len wasn't doom and gloom around.

_Because she reminded him of-_

_Because she reminded him of-_

_Because she reminded him of-_

_He missed-_

Len changed his thought process. _Homeroom... Homeroom... Homeroom... Hmm_. And finally, he found it through the crowd of shoving teens.

_Beeep_.

The electronic bell had rung... He was in his seat just in time.

"Feck! Late on my second day..." Len heard the odd transfer student mutter. He snickered inwardly.

"**Your going to have to go to a doctors about your ankle... And your leg... And your eye. Limping to class isn't going to help you." **

"Erm.. I don't- I mean, of course!" The boy, (Oliver, I believe his name was?) grinned nervously. Poor kid. Trying so hard to understand our ways but failing. However, his errors in japanese were hilarious.

He was still convinced that 'tsundere' was 'sun-deer.'

After twenty minutes of homeroom, the class transitioned into math. Len proceeded to tune out. He fell into a deep sleep after promising himself he would only rest his eyelids.

His dream was a sad one. Something about Rin. However, it was moving so fast and h-

_SMACK. _A ruler hitting the side of his desk shocking him awake. He jumped and his chair tipped backwards. He fell. The class started laughing. The teacher was not and neither was Len.

"REN KAGAMI! ARE YOU AWAKE YET? BECAUSE IF NOT, YOU CAN FALL OFF OF THE TABLE, TOO!" Len ended up getting a detention.

He cut himself in science by accident, was picked on in language arts, and got his homework stolen in social studies.

During his electives he slept and got two more detentions. Once more, he felt miserable.

* * *

**Poor Len, I love torturing him, hehehe...**


End file.
